there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
