yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Will exercising make me less horny?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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