do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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