I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
