did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
