Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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