There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
