her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.