Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
