A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
