It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
