I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize