I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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