i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
