What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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