We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
