First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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