I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Don't EVER smell your tampon
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
