VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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