You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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