yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
honey bunches of taint.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
