no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
