and i looked up. we had an audience...
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
you didnt know i had herpes?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Randomize
