im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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