dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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