nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
