Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize