highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
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not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
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