why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
