Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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