You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
