I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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