everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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