He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Randomize
