Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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