Where are you?
In a non slutty way
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize