franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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