You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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