oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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