Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize