you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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