I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
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If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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