So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize