It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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