Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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