so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize