Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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