When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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