This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
it's great music for shaving your balls
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
