drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
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He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
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And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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