apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
