i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize