i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
