I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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