why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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